My baby girl will turn twenty this month and as I contemplated what to get her for her birthday, I suddenly recalled with a rush of emotion that twenty years ago this week I was put on bedrest at thirty weeks of pregnancy due to heavy bleeding from placenta previa. Twenty years ago this week I was fighting for my life and that of my baby girl. Twenty years ago this week, having recently moved across the country away from family and friends, I was rushed to the hospital, having made quick arrangements for the care of my two younger children. I'm so thankful for the neighborhood and church friends who rescued our new little family.
I am so grateful that I still live in the same town and as I drove to a dentist appointment on Monday, past the house we were renting at the time I was put on bedrest, tears filled my eyes as I sent prayers and assurances to the Me of twenty years ago: "Things are going to be O.K. Your baby girl will live and thrive and you will make eternal friends as they come to your aid both at home with your children and to you in the hospital. Your being in the hospital will also be the means of blessing those you need your influence."
One of those who was blessed by serving me was my faithful visiting teacher. We didn't know each other well yet but she sprang into action as soon as she heard of my need, and in our first phone conversation from the hospital she revealed to me that she was having fertility issues. In subsequent visits and conversations I was able to reassure her and steer her towards a more helpful doctor. Twenty years later, she is now the mother of four beautiful daughters.
As I felt the power of the events of twenty years ago, I had a strong desire to find out the exact dates that everything happened, and was delighted to find that I had kept all my calendars in a binder including notes on who had taken the kids or brought dinner, when I was admitted to the hospital, etc. I started posting these recollections on facebook, tagging facebook friends who are mentioned in the notes. I am so grateful for these eternal friendships and the technology that helps us to keep them alive and growing.
Another great treasure was uncovered when I opened these calendar pages: I had jotted notes in the margins of funny things the kids had said or done! I had completely forgotten about all these things and they are priceless jewels to me. I went through and read every single one, and I'm going to transcribe them, send the document to my kids, and also post it on our familysearch.org account.
I really, really miss my three older kids who are out of the house. I am so grateful I have one still at home and that he likes lie on the couch with his head on my lap while I crochet, all 5'6" 140 pounds of him. But I obsess about how much I miss the others. So imagine my delight when I found this time capsule of their sweet and funny words scribbled on my 1995 calendar. When I read their words I can hear their little voices in my head.
I also kept a record of things I had sewn and read, so would feel a sense of having "accomplished something" on those busy days. Those notes are marginally interesting but the greatest treasure is those experiences and memories of my children. I am so grateful to have been raised by parents and a church that valued family history, and keeping records, no matter how quickly scribbled. I am grateful that these past twenty years, so packed full of blessings, HAPPENED. They happened and I will always treasure them and nothing can take that away from me. And, to quote my friend Val who is farther along in this journey than I am (and whose daughter, a mother herself now, took care of my little kids when I was in the hospital), "There are many joys ahead."
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"To believe in God is to know that all the rules will be fair, and that there will be wonderful surprises." --Ugo Betti
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